Why Shakespears are rubbish (for us)

Why do we need to learn books such as Macbeth for our English class?
This is funny, because we are learning a alienated language to help improve our ENGLISH! But Shakespears do not contribute anything to our knowledge except in communicating with Rosswell's aliens in 50 years time.
We need to study more about "The Great Gatsby", or novels that speaks PROPER English and not such thy and thou Englishted language that is marvelous for OLD people such as the Queen of England and the Pope.
We are 17 and looking forward to the future that speaks a revolutionary English language... Schools will need to reconsider their curriculum in English class. They will need to change those old fashioned old men smoking pipes in IB to a futuristic thinking of young and modern educated to lead the IB...
We as students do not need poetic language, because we are not going to be a poet or writing books about Romeo and Juliet, but we need something different... Something James Bondish style of books which is very cool and does not use slanks but rather a more sophisticated English language.
The school should make a third language class which is "A3 Alien language HL"